Are You Enough?

Dear Beloved,

Have you ever wondered if you are enough?  Are you enough woman? Are you enough man? Are you enough mother or father? Are you a good ENOUGH employee? Are you a good ENOUGH brother or sister?  If you have lived then you probably have allowed this thought to cross one or two streets in you mind.  What makes us think that we are not ENOUGH?  This seems like an easy question as I ponder over it to write this piece, but as I continue to think on it I realize that it is not as easy as I thought.  I’m a magazine fanatic.  I love to read and write so; I have about ten different magazine subscriptions. I read two newspapers a day and I read my Act of Faith by Iyanla Vanzant every morning when I get to work.  In all of the magazines I see fit, thin women with beautiful hair and skin and clothes that look like they were made especially for them (they probably were).  The fantasies created in the magazines are what I was intending to focus on with this particular piece, but then as I thought I realized that it goes way deeper than that.  The magazines may allow us to continue the illusion of not being enough, but it does not start there.  For some of us it started with or without our parents being able to instill a good sense of self within us.  For others it was that first failure that we could not get over that began to drag us down and for still others it may have been a life changing event such as losing a job and not being able to get back in the work force at the salary we were once able to command or have the title or office that we once had.  There are lots and lots of reasons that may contribute to us thinking that we are not enough, but just as there are those reasons there is that funny Newton’s third law that says for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.  How often do you stop and think about the positive when something negative is going on?  Rarely if ever if you are anything like me, every now and then I will say, “oh it could have been worse or I will say look on the bright side.” But, in most cases I am stuck in the moment not worrying about the positive side because I don’t see it.  This is how our self-esteem becomes blemished to the point of non-recognition. 

I am a diehard Queen Latifah fan, so when I received my December-January issue of MORE Magazine with her on the cover I sat down and I read her interview.  I knew that the likely hood of being told anything new and revealing about Queen Latifah was little to none, but Queen Latifah always has something positive to offer her fans when she does an interview and that is what I was reading for.  As expected she did not disappoint.  As Queen Latifah looks back and reflects on her life she does not get bitter at things that she was not successful at but instead she uses them as stepping stones with the understanding that as long as she is alive there will be more things to come.  I love it!!

Some of us may think that EGO is just a bolstering self-ability, but it can also be a tear down.  An ego is just baggage that eventually will way you down, so take a look at yourself.  Your whole self and decide if you are doing what you want to do.  Look at yourself and decide if you are being the best person that you can be.  If not then take what you have and use it for good.  Take what you have and make it enough, because unlike some things there may not be more where that came from.  Remember that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, so when you do your good deed and end up with a flat don’t trip. When you lend money and get that unexpected bill in the mail, don’t trip.  When you cuss the mail person for bringing it and then someone tells you to have a good or blessed day---don’t trip! You are enough and don’t let rose colored water fool you into believing that you are not.  Sometimes you have to look through (and trudge through) muddy waters to find dry land.  Keep your head to the sky and know that you are enough!  PUT ON YOUR CROWN.

AMEN